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About Photography / Hobbyist CaedmonMale/United States Recent Activity
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Indian Blankets by TexasGael Indian Blankets :icontexasgael:TexasGael 3 0 Red Yucca by TexasGael Red Yucca :icontexasgael:TexasGael 4 0 Texas Wildflowers by TexasGael Texas Wildflowers :icontexasgael:TexasGael 2 0 Bluebonnet by TexasGael Bluebonnet :icontexasgael:TexasGael 2 0 My First Tattoo by TexasGael My First Tattoo :icontexasgael:TexasGael 0 0 The Aliens have Arrived by TexasGael The Aliens have Arrived :icontexasgael:TexasGael 5 0 Getting Ready by TexasGael Getting Ready :icontexasgael:TexasGael 3 0 Focus by TexasGael Focus :icontexasgael:TexasGael 0 0 Musician by TexasGael Musician :icontexasgael:TexasGael 2 4 A Bride and Her Cake by TexasGael A Bride and Her Cake :icontexasgael:TexasGael 0 0 Glow by TexasGael Glow :icontexasgael:TexasGael 1 0 Colorado Sunset by TexasGael Colorado Sunset :icontexasgael:TexasGael 5 0 Blue Alien by TexasGael Blue Alien :icontexasgael:TexasGael 3 0 An Almost Forgotten Time by TexasGael An Almost Forgotten Time :icontexasgael:TexasGael 1 0 Celtic Christianity by TexasGael Celtic Christianity :icontexasgael:TexasGael 1 0 Purple Clouds by TexasGael Purple Clouds :icontexasgael:TexasGael 4 3

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Bamburgh Castle by newcastlemale Bamburgh Castle :iconnewcastlemale:newcastlemale 378 124 Fisherman by Ornicar-photographie Fisherman :iconornicar-photographie:Ornicar-photographie 114 18 Morning Dawn by hannes-flo Morning Dawn :iconhannes-flo:hannes-flo 79 2 Peaceful Evening by John-Peter Peaceful Evening :iconjohn-peter:John-Peter 166 10 Archon concept 182182182 by Eddy-Shinjuku Archon concept 182182182 :iconeddy-shinjuku:Eddy-Shinjuku 341 9 The Watchman by MikeFShaw The Watchman :iconmikefshaw:MikeFShaw 126 35 Never Let Me Go.... by silviya Never Let Me Go.... :iconsilviya:silviya 82 33 Ophelias Dreams - Stock by Miss-REdreaming Ophelias Dreams - Stock :iconmiss-redreaming:Miss-REdreaming 22 2 Cold, Dark Water by goodeggproductions
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Cold, Dark Water :icongoodeggproductions:goodeggproductions 68 1
Wings by Ka-Wo Wings :iconka-wo:Ka-Wo 382 30 Panzers by rOEN911 Panzers :iconroen911:rOEN911 403 24 Lavender beauty by thefirebomb Lavender beauty :iconthefirebomb:thefirebomb 121 1 vinyl 03 by sammhaelss
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vinyl 03 :iconsammhaelss:sammhaelss 11 0
Heavy Water by hannes-flo Heavy Water :iconhannes-flo:hannes-flo 102 6 Ophelias Dreams nude Stock by Miss-REdreaming
Mature content
Ophelias Dreams nude Stock :iconmiss-redreaming:Miss-REdreaming 63 11
A date with Johnny by sollenafotografie A date with Johnny :iconsollenafotografie:sollenafotografie 116 3

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TexasGael's Profile Picture
TexasGael
Caedmon
Artist | Hobbyist | Photography
United States
The Wandering Gael is a depressive castaway, loved by his wife and children, striving to live simply and softly. He writes software for a living, but would much prefer to spend his days flirting with his wife, playing with his kids, reading with the birds in his flower gardens and writing with the faeries in his head.
Interests


I’ve always been an intelligent person.  Growing up I always noticed the patterns of things, in shapes and forms, and later in ideas and concepts.  Though homeschooled, I did well and ended up making a high of 1350 on the SAT, 31 on the ACT and then gained a final GPA of 3.69 earning my Bachelor of Science degree in Computer Science and Engineering at the University of Texas at Arlington.  I’ve never not had an agile and competent mind.

In fact, as might be readily apparent, my mind always been a source of pride for me.  I have always lived in my mind, and I, as do many intelligent introverts, prefer the company of my inner demons and angels than the company of similar beings around and external to me.

I’ve relied on my mind in my career and in my hobbies and in my relationships, utilizing it to make friends and succeed and enjoy the small nuances of life.

But then, about 5 years ago, agitated by a very painful experience leaving the church I grew up in, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder reared it’s tenacious head and what was my favorite gift became my special curse.  My mind – my friend – became my enemy.

Where once I could listen to the internal dialogue with pleasure, now that dialogue became a flood, a torrent of anxiety-inducing madness.  Where once the waters of my mind were fairly tranquil and fair, now I drowned in a shit storm, chocked by anxieties and compulsions, depressions and inanities.

Now, 5 years removed, two of which have been spent in therapy and on medication, my mind has become my frenemy: neither/both friend nor enemy, that weird uncle that you have to be related to, but which you really don’t want to be seen with.  It’s a humbling existence: having to rely on something that might very well decide to betray you at the drop of the proverbial hat.  You never know when your day will be roses or thorns (often its both).  Clarity-of-mind and the mind-fog have become close bosom-buddies, and both like to fuck with you and your fears.

Such is the life of someone with OCD.  I do not expect to be healed of it.  In some ways, these days, I don’t know that I want to.  I just want to learn how to live with it.  To exist with it.

Because maybe that weird uncle is me.

  • Listening to: Oh My My - OneRepublic
  • Reading: Good Omens - Terry Pratchett, Neil Gaiman
  • Eating: Noosa Yogurt (Honey)
  • Drinking: Coffee

Comments


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:iconglamourphotolight:
GlamourPhotoLight Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2017  Professional Photographer
Thanks for the watch!
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:icondhc72:
dhc72 Featured By Owner Apr 25, 2017
thanks for the fave
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:iconeintoern:
EintoeRn Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2017  Hobbyist Photographer
marsmalopenyOK by altergromit

Lots of thanks for the :+fav:ing !
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:iconmelintelinas:
melintelinas Featured By Owner Mar 13, 2017  Hobbyist Photographer
Thanks for the fav!
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:iconivanvladik:
IvanVladik Featured By Owner Mar 11, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you very much for the fave. I hope you're doing well.
Reply
:icontexasgael:
TexasGael Featured By Owner Mar 11, 2017  Hobbyist Photographer
I'm doing allright.  Had some personal stuff go down, but it hasn't toppled me, so that's always a positive!  Yourself?  Get a therapist?
Reply
:iconivanvladik:
IvanVladik Featured By Owner Mar 11, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
Sorry you had stuff go down but I'm glad you came out ok. I had to put my dog down yesterday so I'm grieving but I'm not in crisis or anything. Just really fucking sad. Still waiting on the therapist. Yay Canadian health care! lol. I shouldn't complain. It's better than a lot of places. Take Care my friend. 
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:icondeb-e-ann:
Deb-e-ann Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2017
Thank you for :+fav:ing 'Curled Up' :)
Curled Up by Deb-e-ann
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:iconivanvladik:
IvanVladik Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you for the fave. Have a good day. :-)
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:icontexasgael:
TexasGael Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2017  Hobbyist Photographer
sure thing!
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